The most powerful Christmas`s New Moon

I really miss writing my blog but I couldn't get myself into writing for exactly 2 months.

Time flew by like a comet on the night sky and my life turned around in all possible meanings. I went through a life changing experience. A messenger came to my life and spun everything.

In this complicated hard time I have realised how much I didn't know myself and what I am capable of. I was suddenly full of energy and felt like I can do anything in the world. Nothing was going to stop me. Well, unfortunately it all stopped so fast as it has started. I had to rest. I was sleeping 10 hours per day. I was exhausted, disappointed and was lacking of love, courage and strength.

I grieved and I cried. I realised how much I lied to myself about what I really want. Then I calmed down, started to breathe and live again.

Today is one of the most powerful New Moon in the whole year and so I did the magic ritual about things I wish to erase from my life as well as things I wish to welcome to my life. I believe this energy will turn into beautiful meanings and acts.

I keep searching within my soul and heart what I really wish for. I know I grew so much in past few months because a messenger shown me a path and hope.

I truly believe that I can overcome my fears and start doing things I love the most because they require a courage and honesty within me.

I feel complete gratitude towards this messenger who spent so little time with me but pass so much on me. I am ready now.

Love what you Do. Do what you Love. 

Sounds like a cliche? Sounds impossible? Sounds right?

Which option is You? What do you strive in life? What do you do in order to do what you love?

I have been asking myself those questions for many many years because I was unhappy, thinking I do not belong anywhere. I was always what people call  "a black sheep". 

When I was still a kid things were fine. I even remember going to a primary school and quite enjoying myself because I have had great friends. It all started at the high school when me with other girls were  bullied by a boy group. Then all my allergies started, I was permanently ill and my life purpose was to get drunk so I end up unconscious every time I could. At the uni, I had some friends but we were never real friends. We were just a survival company during those 3 long years. At home I also had a situation because my mom`s husband wouldn't talk to me without a reason for long 3 years. I was feeling I do not belong anywhere.

My salvation was my departure to the UK. There I quickly became aware of who I really am and what capacity I really have. I started to work on my English. I built real friendships and got rid of all my illnesses. This process of knowing myself is lasting till now ( 16 years later) but at least now I recognise what is right for me and which people I want in my life. I also started to like myself. For me living abroad was a priceless experience which formed my way of thinking "out of the box".

I finally found out what my real passions are and now I am making them part of my work.

I wish everyone a very fruitful life journey with as many experience as possible before you truly know yourself and truly know what you want in life. 

Society & Me

Once again I have been told this week that I truly am a weirdo. It wasn't for the first time nor the last time I guess. I get this a lot. I live in the common european society however I certainly appear not to be the part of it. At my age of 36, I am single, without kids but also without debts. I also don't owe anything except few boxes of clothes and stuff. Well I do not count my dog Charlie which I got 10 months ago and she is my first actual commitment. I also live with my best friend - a single mother with enormous debts and 3 small boys.

And I love it. I never felt alone or sad. I always have a best friend to talk to. I have always someone to open a bottle of wine with and share all my ups and downs.

I feel rich because I am surrounded by family unless like some single bachelors who dare to judge me because to them living alone in the small apartment and have a car means "having a life".

I certainly do not share this point of view because for me life means for example pack my bags and tomorrow be on the other side of the world. I like it this way. I like this absolute freedom. I do not want to belong to the matrix as majority of people around me. 

I am glad I never felt into hands of greedy banks, insurance companies etc. Instead of that I have

FREEDOM

Symphony of a Friendship 

Today I celebrate the 1st anniversary of living with my best friend.
It has been one of the most challenging year of my life in many ways. I realised that if you are lucky enough and will find a perfect partner for you then you evolve faster than if you are stuck with some "kinda OK" partner or a friend. That is why the best friends and great partners are worthy to cherish and to fight for, regardless of today`s affair. They have been there yesterday and will be there tomorrow to help you calm down your demons. They make you a better person and they really see you. Im so lucky to have experience this in every country I lived in. Some grounds like Spain are more friendly thus finding a great friend doesn't require special effort. On the other hand, finding a soulmate here in the Czech republic where environment is almost hostile was truly difficult task and it took lots of time. But now I am calm and growing everyday thanks to my angel Monika. This is my big thank to her for finding me and not letting me go.

I love you.

Flow

Mother Nature just flows because she is the smartest being on the planet.
If you are forcing something against its own will it will not be natural, therefore it will not flow. It will get stuck. You will get stuck.

Your actions determine your fate. Are you prepared to evolve and let go?

Have you ever noticed that if you let things to happen they will figure out how to flow in your best interest.We have to learn so much from the Mother Nature and what do we do instead? We destroy her. We act like we own her. Like we are smarter and and we can empower her. Really? I beg those who still think this way to think about the harm they are causing. Please stop cruelty on the animals and stop destroying our beautiful Mother. She is the one who gave you life. 

A book which really change my way of perception is Message for the Tribe of Many Colours

And a lovely video below that moves me every time I watch it.

Irony of Isolation

My nature is to talk to anyone about anything. When I meet total strangers I can just compliment them or ask them what is on my mind at that moment. Yes, this is me and this is my way to stay connected with the outer world. 

I do not read newspapers neither do I watch TV. I basically have no interest to get information via media. I rather find for myself. I rather feel that person`s vibe and energy instead of passively receiving made up stories. 

Media has overpowered many people who sightlessly believe in it. People stopped thinking for themselves and echo back what they hear from TV and radio. Ironically they get disconnected with people around them because they stopped talking to them. As this gap is growing, isolation growing too.

I wish for everyone to start talking to people on the street, in the supermarket, in the queue, on the train.

It will change your lives. You will get richer and will surround yourself with the real people.

Happy Friday everyone.

Mindfulness

My friend invited me to the Vipassana meditation. It was my first meditation ever and I didn't know what to expect. We were explain the basics of this meditation, its elements and benefits. The practise was composed of three parts. The bending part, the walking part and the sitting part. I am  a person who is unable to stay still for longer than 1 minutes unless my mind and thoughts wonders somewhere else. Im constant planner, looking to the future or to the past. I thought I could definitely benefit from the meditation because its goal is to keep you in the present moment.

I really enjoyed the bending and the walking part but quite couldn't get through the sitting part where sitting still for 10-15mins was the crucial task. During the day when the intervals of each part got longer I got frustrated because I was feeling exhausted, asleep and with a headache. I was happy that at 4pm it was all over and I went home to rest. I thought that meditation is not simply for me. I have to say it was damm hard. I never felt this kind of exhaustion even after the hard training in the gym.

I slept on it and I woke up different. Calm, still, patient, happy and with the clear head without any thought or worries. I am enjoying my Sunday when I can do things but I do them as they come and I don't force myself to run, plan, think or get crazy.
I will definitely be practising more of Vipassana and even might go for a retreat in Thailand or somewhere in Europe. I know this will help me on my way to achieve my goals because  I know that if you can't live in the present moment it is like you don't live at all.

This bracelet is a gift from the monk Ajahn Tong Sirimangalo to all who went through at least one day of Vipassana.  Vipassana centre